"Why are adult women believed to be the main drivers of AI companionship?"
I think you've actually given good evidence for a more parsimonious explanation. If men have universally higher demand for sexualised AI girlfriends, and Chinese internet censorship limits access to highly sexualised content, then there will be fewer legal products that meet male demands in China, so the market can only develop in a female-oriented direction.
Good point, and a glaring missing piece of the puzzle is the difference in the prevalence and ease of access to prostitutions between the US and China. You can’t do a market analysis without looking at the competitions.
> Social media metrics again reinforce this gender pattern, with Reddit’s AI girlfriend community (r/AIGirlfriend) having 44k members compared to fewer than 100 in male-focused AI companion subreddits.
This is the opposite of the truth. I just checked and /r/myboyfriendisai has "56K visitors and 1.8K contributions per week", which is nearly 3x as many visitors and 4x as many contributors as /r/aigirlfriend (20k and 479 respectively). It's not showing member numbers for me but I assume the ratio is probably similar.
Yeah I found this out a few days before the release, but I think r/myboyfrindisai is more about dating GPT rather than a specific AI companion, and significantly less NSFW content. MIT Media Lab has a paper about this subreddit.
Wow, this is genuinely insightful. What struck me most is how differently we perceive “AI girlfriends” versus “AI boyfriends.” Using an AI girlfriend still seems more stigmatized — almost like paying a woman for attention, which society tends to frame as transactional or “escort-like.”
But when women “rent” boyfriends or visit male hosts in Japan or China, it’s often seen as playful or even self-care, not shameful. And that translates to AI boyfriends too.
It’s fascinating how gender norms shape the moral framing of intimacy — even when the partner is literally a machine.
Men are great in their way, but women are smart, powerful, and tired of doing the lion’s share of the work in a typical partnership. Men work 9-5, but especially with children, women often work 24/7. My apologies to the good men out there that do their fair share or even more.
Well written. As a non Asian with a Cantonese GF, I am a little tuned in to the male to female imbalance in China, the number of females that have chosen city life over country life and the conflicts that arises from that, and another issue that you may want to address: the number of Chinese men who seek wives from North Korea, thereby reducing the available women in Korea, and dramatically adding to the tension there.
In the US, the male incel (involuntary celibates) population seems to be out of control in its expansion. They make us realize two reasons why American men are so obsessed with sites like Pornhub - one, because pornography never says no. - and two, because too many men were never taught how to be gracious and validating to women.
I look forward to reading more of your exceptionally well written exploratory stories. Again, well done - Wayne
"Why are adult women believed to be the main drivers of AI companionship?"
I think you've actually given good evidence for a more parsimonious explanation. If men have universally higher demand for sexualised AI girlfriends, and Chinese internet censorship limits access to highly sexualised content, then there will be fewer legal products that meet male demands in China, so the market can only develop in a female-oriented direction.
Good point, and a glaring missing piece of the puzzle is the difference in the prevalence and ease of access to prostitutions between the US and China. You can’t do a market analysis without looking at the competitions.
This article makes me chuckle and feel sad at the same time.
> Social media metrics again reinforce this gender pattern, with Reddit’s AI girlfriend community (r/AIGirlfriend) having 44k members compared to fewer than 100 in male-focused AI companion subreddits.
This is the opposite of the truth. I just checked and /r/myboyfriendisai has "56K visitors and 1.8K contributions per week", which is nearly 3x as many visitors and 4x as many contributors as /r/aigirlfriend (20k and 479 respectively). It's not showing member numbers for me but I assume the ratio is probably similar.
Yeah I found this out a few days before the release, but I think r/myboyfrindisai is more about dating GPT rather than a specific AI companion, and significantly less NSFW content. MIT Media Lab has a paper about this subreddit.
Wow, this is genuinely insightful. What struck me most is how differently we perceive “AI girlfriends” versus “AI boyfriends.” Using an AI girlfriend still seems more stigmatized — almost like paying a woman for attention, which society tends to frame as transactional or “escort-like.”
But when women “rent” boyfriends or visit male hosts in Japan or China, it’s often seen as playful or even self-care, not shameful. And that translates to AI boyfriends too.
It’s fascinating how gender norms shape the moral framing of intimacy — even when the partner is literally a machine.
fascinating contrast. America turns AI into companionship and consumer behavior, China turns it into social stability and control.
two cultures using the same tech to solve opposite anxieties — one about loneliness, the other about order.
Very unique topic👍
Great research!
Men are great in their way, but women are smart, powerful, and tired of doing the lion’s share of the work in a typical partnership. Men work 9-5, but especially with children, women often work 24/7. My apologies to the good men out there that do their fair share or even more.
Well written. As a non Asian with a Cantonese GF, I am a little tuned in to the male to female imbalance in China, the number of females that have chosen city life over country life and the conflicts that arises from that, and another issue that you may want to address: the number of Chinese men who seek wives from North Korea, thereby reducing the available women in Korea, and dramatically adding to the tension there.
In the US, the male incel (involuntary celibates) population seems to be out of control in its expansion. They make us realize two reasons why American men are so obsessed with sites like Pornhub - one, because pornography never says no. - and two, because too many men were never taught how to be gracious and validating to women.
I look forward to reading more of your exceptionally well written exploratory stories. Again, well done - Wayne
What if those two robots were adapting to each other in a relationship, virtual of course?
Sweet Bastet's tail, I used to think that I had problems....
Zilan, I sent a message to you over substack DM about potentially supporting/ conducting research for you!